Lamest Superpower Ever? Chime in

General discussions about superheroines!
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DrDominator9
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Here's a fun topic people might enjoy contributing to here. Can you offer up an instance from a comic, a story or a video/movie where the hero or heroine has a power that's strikes you as silly or useless?

My suggestion comes from the Legion of Superheroes comics: Bouncing Boy. Seriously? That's his power. And he made it through their stringent vetting process? Just how often would that power come in handy? Besides, you know, "Could you bounce down to the supermarket and get a carton of milk for the team fridge?"

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Who else has a hero or heroine with a particular power, even within a legitimate set of them that's doesn't jive with the sense of heroic?
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GeekyPornCritic

I'm nominating Squirrel Girl with one of the lamest superpowers ever. She has the ability to command squirrels. That sounds so boring. Are they going to collect nuts for her to crack? I think her character would have potential if she did not have a theme of a squirrel. She has super strength and agility, and inspired to be Iron Man's sidekick. Give her a different name with the same powers of super strength and agility, and a new design.
Last edited by GeekyPornCritic 4 years ago, edited 1 time in total.
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DrDominator9
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Squirrel Girl? Does she steal the villain's nuts and hide them away for the winter?
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Damselbinder

GeekyPornCritic wrote:
4 years ago
I'm nominating Squirrel Girl with one of the lamest superpowers ever. She has the ability to command squirrels. That sounds so boring. Are they going to collect nuts for her to crack? I think her character would have potential if she did not have a theme of a squirrel. She has super strength and agility, and inspired to be Iron Man's sidekick. Give her a different name with the same powers of super strength and agility, and a new design.
Isn't that literally the whole point of her, though. She's meant to be a bit of a joke character. Her power is just to control squirrels... but she's one of the strongest heroes around. It's funny.

I mean, it's NOT funny, but it's supposed to be. You're not supposed to take her seriously.

As for my actual vote, I had one character who had the power that they were immune to cyanide. I call it a lame power because at no point in their life is the average person ever even going to realise that they have this power, so they're not going to know to put it to any use.
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"What's your super power again?"
"I'm rich." - Batman

Like having billions of dollars automatically makes you a super hero when it's how you spend it that makes the difference.
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tallyho
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How strange are the ways of the gods ...........and how cruel.

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DrDominator9
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Could have been worse. Could have been Batter-Eater Lad.
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Damselbinder

tallyho wrote:
4 years ago
matter eater lad.jpg


Holmes.jpg
Are you kidding me? Matter Eater Lad is a bit specialised, but he's amazing. He can eat anything. He could chomp right through Darkseid's skull, or any lock or seal. He's incredibly useful. It just looks dopey.
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tallyho
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You have overlooked the fact that his effective range is actually anything within his own lips.
That seems somewhat lame in a crimefighting scenario, no?

And whilst he can bite thru anything that just means he can choke on anything too lol
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Damselbinder

tallyho wrote:
4 years ago
You have overlooked the fact that his effective range is actually anything within his own lips.
That seems somewhat lame in a crimefighting scenario, no?
Well, he it'd be okay at close range. Plus, a superhuman can do more than fight stuff. MEL is part of a team. He steps in when the situation requires his power. Like I say it's dopey, but with a huge amount of utility. Like, uh, Moody Blues or something.
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Never reaching the end,
Fences I've eaten,
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tallyho
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Damselbinder wrote:
4 years ago
tallyho wrote:
4 years ago
You have overlooked the fact that his effective range is actually anything within his own lips.
That seems somewhat lame in a crimefighting scenario, no?
Well, he it'd be okay at close range.
Thats REALLY CLOSE range if you can only attack things inside your own mouth lol
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GeekyPornCritic

Color Kid is worthy of this list as well. His only superpower is changing colors. Does this mean he can change me from black to white? Then, I can obtain white privilege. Hmm....he may be useful after all....
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DrDominator9
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GeekyPornCritic wrote:
4 years ago
Color Kid is worthy of this list as well. His only superpower is changing colors. Does this mean he can change me from black to white? Then, I can obtain white privilege. Hmm....he may be useful after all....

color-kid-e1465326492552.png
Are you sure they haven't updated his superhero name to Diversity Lad?
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Damselbinder

DrDominator9 wrote:
4 years ago
GeekyPornCritic wrote:
4 years ago
Color Kid is worthy of this list as well. His only superpower is changing colors. Does this mean he can change me from black to white? Then, I can obtain white privilege. Hmm....he may be useful after all....

color-kid-e1465326492552.png
Are you sure they haven't updated his superhero name to Diversity Lad?
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There's always the very brief cameo of Arm-Fall-Off Boy from one of the Legion's casting calls.

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Aquaman used to be pretty lame until they retconned him from this:

A guy who could only basically talk to fish.
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To this:
A bad-ass looking superdude who can go toe to toe with Superman and Wonderwoman (and can still talk to fish).
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tallyho
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Found Arm fall off boy a while back but I think I was traumatised into forgetting him.
It does make you wonder what they were taking when they came up with him
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batgirl1969
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Damselbinder wrote:
4 years ago
tallyho wrote:
4 years ago
matter eater lad.jpg


Holmes.jpg
Are you kidding me? Matter Eater Lad is a bit specialised, but he's amazing. He can eat anything. He could chomp right through Darkseid's skull, or any lock or seal. He's incredibly useful. It just looks dopey.
he is going down on that fence like a $20 hooker!!! I guess he doesn't go down on his boy or girlfriend!!!
Damselbinder

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Don't forget about No-Armed Tiger-Man
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